I’m still feeling sick and sneezy and out of it so I’m doing little jobs to clear my workspace and make me more productive in the someday future when just sitting here at my desk doesn’t feel like it’s stretching me to my limits. (Argh. Colds. Such a small thing to make a person feel so bad.)

I realized that my targeting has been off these past few months and that I need to build a more effective campaign. I knew I had to change it after I talked to a prospect who thought I offered services that I do theoretically offer but not at a level that competes with her. (She put me on her books but I haven’t gotten work there yet.) Basically there are things I could do for a small business that I could not do for a large business but my marketing materials made me look like I could take on bigger stuff. The postcards I sent out were too general and I need to target them better so that I have a campaign for small businesses and another campaign for large businesses.

I still haven’t figured out my specialty although I know it’s a good idea to have one. I keep thinking the stuff I’m good at will rise to the top because that’s how it usually seems to go. Meanwhile I said no to two jobs (one offer, one potential offer) this week because they weren’t a good fit for me. It was terrifying. But as I contemplated the situations I knew that short-term gain would mean long-term problems so I said no, cringing the whole time. What made it especially hard is that these were situations I’d have said yes to six months ago although it would have been with the same doubts I had this time. Still, saying no to work? Saying no to regular gigs that could cover my bills? Saying no because I have such strong belief in my big picture future that I’m willing to risk my small picture present? My god. What hubris. (Julia says I did the right thing. From her mouth to god’s ear, I say.)

It helps knowing that my budget is covered ’til spring (I got some bigger assignments) and I’m hoping that in the next few months I’ll find more work coming my way. Sometimes — even though I know how much effort I’ve put into this — sometimes it feels serendipitous. Someone will email or call me with work and I just can’t believe work has come to me instead of me having to chase it although the truth is all the work I’m doing marketing is chasing — it just doesn’t feel like it. I think it’s because it’s part of set out plan. So I do something and I don’t worry about the results from that particular thing because I’m already onto the next part of my plan.

I need to think about my work/creative goals for 2008 and get a little more specific this year. I’ve got a dollar amount in mind but I need to really look at where I want to be in a year and what experiences I want to have under my belt.

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