A dozen for the new year list
Sep 30, 2008 The Story of My Life
1. I have a wicked bad hormonal headache. I hope starting out in grouchy pain doesn’t cast a pall on the rest of my year!
2. My mom and my aunt are coming over for honeycake later. But we don’t have the car so no shofar for us. (Brett got a new-to-us car in what we’ve deemed a signing bonus. There are many advantages to going to work for a friend! But he doesn’t have the tags for it yet so we’re still acting as a 1-car family.)
3. Pennie is coming over tomorrow to see Madison’s very loose tooth! Yes, Madison is only four. We’re shocked, too.
4. Speaking of Madison and Pennie … the other day Madison and I were in the grocery store where there was a truly scary rubber animatronic witch with lit up eyes. (At the Westerville Kroger’s for you locals.) Noah would have had to leave the store IMMEDIATELY if he saw that at four but Madison was fascinated. I asked her if she thought it was scary and she said, “No, funny.” Then she wanted to touch it. Pennie is a huge fan of horror movies like Saw and The Hills Have Eyes (I can’t even look at those posters!) and also thinks they’re funny. Who knew horror appreciation was genetic?
5. I let the kids decorate for Halloween even though I usually make ‘em wait ’til October 1st but my head is killing me and I wanted some coffee and I wanted to drink it in peace. They did a bang up job of it, too.
6. I’m trying to dig out of the morass of undone housework due to Brett being home for that year. See, we thought he’d be a better housekeeper than I am but it turns out that he’s a surface cleaner. He doesn’t know that you also have to periodically clean from the inside out so I’m upending drawers, digging through closets and clearing off the top of the refrigerator.
7. I also went through the kids’ winter clothes and we will need to hit the thrift stores hard for both of them. I haven’t had Noah try his winter coat on yet but I think Madison is covered there thanks to Abby.
8. I’m caught up on work, which is a nice feeling. The article that was giving me fits source-wise went to bed and I really enjoyed writing it. I realize I’m most happiest when I can mix marketing communications with consumer stuff. Now if I can just figure out when to fit in creative nonfiction…
9. I’ve kept up with my exercise routine for over a month now. I’m definitely getting stronger and have lost a very little — and I mean LITTLE — weight. It’s going to be a long road to my fit by forty goals but it’d be an even longer road if I waited ’til fifty so I’m sucking it up. I love to exercise although you wouldn’t believe it just by looking at me. I also love to eat, which wouldn’t surprise you one bit.
10. To establish an exercise routine I can stick to I need: ease (no elaborate rituals, no weird schedules, no reliance on other people), privacy (no classes, no companions, no nosy trainers) and a decent soundtrack. One thing that surprised me about my mom’s trainer is that it feels like I’m moving in a smaller range than with the other but I think it must also be more focused because I’m really feeling changes in my back, especially my neck and shoulders. I get very sore but I’m also hurting a lot less from my whiplash (once I get past the lactic acid days) so the soreness is worth it. I haven’t really had a bad neck day since I started. Plus my mood? Not as psychotic.
11. I work out in the mornings while channel 34.1 (PBS) is showing kids’ shows. Madison watches ‘em while I sweat and Noah usually sleeps in. If he’s up, he’s doing his school work. A good time is had by all. (And today a better time than was intended because a quick glance at my browser’s history shows that Noah was on Neopets instead of Study Island. Busted!)
12. I want to think about buying a used piano for the kids’ big xmas present. I know Madison would like it and Noah might, too. But I don’t know anything about used piano buying. Anyone have advice to share?
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Tags: abby, clothes, creative, creative nonfiction, exercise, Family, goals, halloween, kids, Madison, marketing communications, my mom, Noah, whiplash, Writing
Everything old is new again
May 17, 2008 Uncategorized
I’m home with the kids today while my husband is at work just like how things used to be but totally different. Brett started today at a Home Depot for three reasons:
- Possibility of getting help with our insurance;
- Learning to do some of the things around the house that need to get done and learning with an employee discount;
- A break from the kids.
Seriously — a break from the kids was a big reason he wanted a job. I hear that.
Meanwhile it looks like my on-site gig, (which amounts to about five days a month across two weeks), might be regular which is what I hoped. At least they’ve already assigned my time to come next month. Perfect! It’s a big chunk of our budget right there and a big relief. Plus it’s fun. I mean really, really fun.
We think we’ll be able to swing the scheduling so that one of us is with the kids while the other is at work but there will surely be times where I’ll have a client meeting when Brett is gone so we’ve got a few back up plans. My sister is always good for some childcare and I volunteered Abby (without speaking to her first but she was game) and there’s Noah’s friend L’s family and the inlaws are back in town, at least for now. So that’s all good although Madison has been periodically showing up in tears to remind us that she never, ever, ever likes to have playdates when one of us is not with her. She says that when she is a mommy she will never, ever, ever leave her kids.
“I hate [job site]! Do all mommies have to go to [job site]? Or do some not go?”
I told her not all mommies go there and she declared that she certainly will not then. I told her this is fine.
I was having some stress earlier this week because someone sent a marketing this or that my way and it was all about getting out there and making zillions of dollars and I looked at it and thought, “I can see a way to market myself with these tools” and I could see how it might work but I could also see that to do it I would have to kinda push and shove some other people who are dabbling in the same sort of thing. And also there’s this marketing tone that’s very, “How much money have YOU made today???” that doesn’t resonate with me AT ALL. In fact, it’s something that kept me leery of marketing communications as a career and I still duck and cover when I show up at a networking meeting and there’s someone at the door glad-handing everyone and saying, “I made six figures in the last six months! How badly do YOU want success???”
The truth is I want some success. This past April with the two missing checks? That’s made me feel a lot less down on the whole money-money-money credo. But — not to be corny — I would be happy with money-money; I don’t need money-money-money. (See, first money covers the bills and the second money puts cash in savings.)
When things were feeling very bad last month, Brett and I sat ourselves down and said, “Can we really do this?” Because it looked like we were on our way to failing. Should Brett go back to a full-time desk job? Would I have to go back to scrambling for nickel-and-dime jobs while the house descended into chaos behind me? We put it all out on the table and decided, “No. We’ll make this work.” (Part of this was because we knew there’d be some very “I told you so” types if we threw in the towel, which made us want to kick freelance ass because we are contrary like that.)
Way back at the beginning of this thing Julia asked me what I wanted from this. Last week she reminded me of this after listening to me angst about not wanting to take over the world. She said, “Dawn, do you remember what your goal was? It was to make enough money to support your habit of being with your family.” (Is that a great line or what?)
This past April scared me so I was thinking, has it scared me enough to head into the dog-eat-dog, high-enthusiasm, take-no-prisoners world of hard-core marketing communications marketing? To elbow my way to the front? To make enemies in the name of getting more work and higher pay-outs? And Julia said, no. Because I don’t need money-money-money when money-money will do.
She also reminded me that I’ve come a long way, baby, in the past year. I know a lot more now and I know which marketing groups seem worth it and which didn’t do much for me so I’m wasting a lot less time smiling stiffly at events. I’ve made friends and contacts and colleagues. I’ve added a whole lot of work to my portfolio. I’ve learned the lingo and how to use it. I’ve learned to listen more than I talk. I’ve got a work wardrobe for the first time in my life and I’ve gained so much confidence that everything feels a lot less hard.
Other accomplishments:
- I’ve had several public speaking gigs and have three more upcoming;
- I’m no longer nervous about returning phone calls to perfect strangers;
- I’m not afraid to turn down work that doesn’t suit me;
- I have people who come to me with work.
That last one, that feels great, lemme tell you.
If this on-site gig sticks around awhile we’ll be in the clear even if someone loses a check (or two) for four (or six) weeks. If Brett likes Home Depot (and I think he will), he’ll be able to get some of the work done around here that’s making him crazy. (Like refinishing our oak floors that weren’t sealed and so are getting trashed; like finishing the basement; like building out an office space for me; like replacing more tile in the crazy bathrooms; like fixing the solar panel thingies on the roof; like rescuing the house from its 50+ year old landscaping.)
And we can support our habit of spending time with each other and with our kids. I know — how selfish are we? But yesterday I worked all morning and then Brett watched three sets of kids for the afternoon while I went thrifting with the moms and then the families all went out to dinner together and Noah sat laughing with the big kids and Madison giggled and fell off her chair with the little kids while the dads talked budgets and the moms talked kids and I thought, “This is what I’m in this for. Friends and family and time enough to work.”
Like everything it’s a balance. I’ll work a zillion hours a week as long as I can do it on my terms — with breaks to eat a sandwich with my husband or watch Noah play lacrosse or give Madison a foggy bath for her runny nose. I’ll hustle and hustle and hustle if I don’t have to sell-out to do it. But I have to stop sometimes to reassess — am I where I want to be and on my way to the next right stop? Today I am. Next week I’ll check again. And on and on and on.
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Tags: at-home parenting, budget, budgets, Erica, freelance, freelancing, inlaws, Julia, Madison, marketing, marketing communications, networking, Noah, Parenting, values, working from home
Finishing first
May 7, 2008 work work work
I almost always get done with tests before anyone else in a class. (The exception was math and foreign languages.) Sometimes I’d get done so far ahead that even after rechecking my answers I’d feel too embarrassed to go up and turn my test in so I’d sit for another ten or twenty minutes. This was because if I turned my test in too early my teacher would inevitably say something like, “Are you sure?” or “Take it back and double-check.” The insinuation being, of course, that anything done that quickly must be a mess. Only (with the exception of math and foreign languages) it never was. It’s because I read fast and I can put my thoughts together quickly. And with keyboards? I type about 115 words per minute.
I got done with this job too quickly, too. I’ll likely still have edits and there’s more to write next week but as of now, I’m done with this stage and I feel so, so nervous about it. Being a fast writer makes me worry.
(Of course this seems crazy because I’m also a very slow writer, which also makes me worry. I take forever to write an essay but service or marketing communications stuff I can write really really fast.)
I got my feedback from two people today and they only wanted minor changes but I still feel like I must’ve done it wrong. (And in fact, I see something I deleted on one sheet but not on another and am afraid it’ll sit there glaring at them and pulsing with, “Do not hire her again. She missed this deletion because she is TOO FAST.”)
I really have no idea what reasonable expectations are so I guess that’s why I’m always worried that I won’t meet them. Argh.
(In financial news, the missing check has been sighted along with the other missing check winging their merry way into our checking account. Our records should reflect that any minute now since they were released yesterday!)
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Tags: essay, job, marketing, marketing communications
Protected: Dawn goes to work
May 5, 2008 work work work
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Tags: corporate writing, freelancing, Madison, marketing, marketing communications
