Nov 192009
We went over to Pennie’s house yesterday to celebrate her birthday and Madison said, “Mommy, would you feel bad if I thought Pennie was prettier than you?”
And I said, “Of course.”
No, I said, “Nope, I think Pennie’s beautiful.”
And she said, “Oh, OK. I think Pennie’s prettier than you are.”
She is, too, so I can’t really be insulted!
But she said I am the prettiest white mommy so at least there’s that!
Related posts:
I seriously, seriously love the way you react to these statements…
I laughed out loud. I love Madison.
She’s right that you ARE pretty for a white mommy. We’ll see whether this is a post that scares PAPs.
My daughter says things out of the blue, like, “It doesn’t matter what you look like, Mommy, it’s what’s inside that counts.” Which I guess I shouldn’t take personally, but… ha!
as I recall she also thinks you smell nice.
Oh, no! LOL, you are better than me, I think my feelings would have been hurt. Does she look like Pennie? I guess everyone wants to think someone they look like is pretty.
Oh yes — they look a lot alike! Here are pics of them together:
http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2008/05/11/pretty-x-2/100_0712
http://www.thiswomanswork.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/dsc05946-copy.JPG
And here’s pics of them around the same age (I love these! They have the same feet!):
http://www.thiswomanswork.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/dsc05787-copy.JPG
http://www.thiswomanswork.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/easterpennie.thumbnail.jpg
PAP here…nope, this post didn’t scare me at all. Made me laugh out loud and look forward to those strange and funny conversations that I will inevitably have with my child.
Cheers, Dawn! That’s quite a girl you’ve got there!
sweet
I love how confident and secure she is in your sturdiness.
That’s something I could put on Spoken in the Mutant Family Household. You know, if you were mutants.
You have such a big heart Dawn. The world would be a better place if we could all be more like you. You rock and Madison is the luckiest kid on the planet to have you for a mom.
I’m not trying to be mushy and I don’t usually use superlatives, but I just feel really moved to say that.
I had to come back to this because I think this is one of those things that would shut down an open adoption in many cases. I’m glad you are not one of those who would freak out and see the “pretty” thing as a competition between mothers.
Another thought I had – it’s positive that Madison sees a woman of color as being petty – this will help her identify with with other woman of color as she matures and not try to trick herself into thinking she is “white.” I’ve read so many stories about TRAs believing themselves to be white and rejecting all aspects of their natural heritage while they are young, only to be forced to face it upon adulthood (or when trying to forge bonds with a community of similar heritage, ie. a Korean student group at college, etc.)