Both my kids are the kind who need to be noticed for doing something important (and they are tough judges of what is important). They want to take up space, both the girl, and the very small boy, who doesn’t take up very much space, physically (making for hilarious circumstances when he goes head to head with boys who are used to being deferred to).

But I respect the other kind of kid (and adult). It’s socially acceptable (and one would even say demanded) to be that kind of woman, the one who doesn’t care if the work she does for the world doesn’t get noticed. The same kind of man has their won difficult road. That’s why “feminism” is really about empowering everyone to be who they are, while recognizing that social/cultural demands make that easier for some people than others.