Comments on: Needing to focus http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/ writing, mothering, writing about mothering Sun, 07 Sep 2008 04:01:45 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc By: who’s privileged in adoption? « a family affair http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/#comment-6691 who’s privileged in adoption? « a family affair Tue, 18 Dec 2007 08:39:29 +0000 http://www.thiswomanswork.com/?p=1784#comment-6691 [...] know enough, I haven’t listened enough, to talk about this. Other people, like Dawn and Nicole, are talking about it more critically and thoughtfully than I could.) I’m going to [...] [...] know enough, I haven’t listened enough, to talk about this. Other people, like Dawn and Nicole, are talking about it more critically and thoughtfully than I could.) I’m going to [...]

]]> By: I wanted to respond to Nicole’s comment | this woman's work http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/#comment-6689 I wanted to respond to Nicole’s comment | this woman's work Sun, 16 Dec 2007 17:52:03 +0000 http://www.thiswomanswork.com/?p=1784#comment-6689 [...] Madison dances about three feet from my laptop. This entry may suffer as a result.) In response to this post she said, in part: Shame is not a value. It’s not a good reason for making decisions. And if [...] [...] Madison dances about three feet from my laptop. This entry may suffer as a result.) In response to this post she said, in part: Shame is not a value. It’s not a good reason for making decisions. And if [...]

]]> By: Squirmy feeling « Paragraphein http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/#comment-6690 Squirmy feeling « Paragraphein Sun, 16 Dec 2007 17:08:05 +0000 http://www.thiswomanswork.com/?p=1784#comment-6690 [...] tactics, emotional blackmail, informed consent, relinquishment |   Dawn wrote two strong, articulate, smart posts about adoption ethics [...] [...] tactics, emotional blackmail, informed consent, relinquishment |   Dawn wrote two strong, articulate, smart posts about adoption ethics [...]

]]> By: Paragraphein http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/#comment-6697 Paragraphein Sat, 15 Dec 2007 22:07:02 +0000 http://www.thiswomanswork.com/?p=1784#comment-6697 Again, mostly agree, but some uneasiness. This right here: "I’d want to talk her out of it. From my perspective, her shame and her singleness aren’t good reasons to place. But what do I know? I’m a feminist. I can’t force my values on her." Yes, you are right, you're not qualified to address those issues with her. But a competent, licensed psychologist IS. And ethically, SHOULD. Shame is not a value. It's not a good reason for making decisions. And if a woman is making a decision out of shame, she SHOULD be challenged on it(appropriately, with all the therapy-techniques counselors have learned, in a way that will be useful to her). Not challenged by you, but by someone who IS qualified and SUPPOSED to do so. There's emotions, and there's information. Right now, unethical treatment takes place on both levels. Ethical adoptions won't be possible until BOTH issues are addressed. And informed consent laws only address one of those issues. Again, mostly agree, but some uneasiness.

This right here: “I’d want to talk her out of it. From my perspective, her shame and her singleness aren’t good reasons to place. But what do I know? I’m a feminist. I can’t force my values on her.”

Yes, you are right, you’re not qualified to address those issues with her.

But a competent, licensed psychologist IS. And ethically, SHOULD.

Shame is not a value. It’s not a good reason for making decisions. And if a woman is making a decision out of shame, she SHOULD be challenged on it(appropriately, with all the therapy-techniques counselors have learned, in a way that will be useful to her). Not challenged by you, but by someone who IS qualified and SUPPOSED to do so.

There’s emotions, and there’s information. Right now, unethical treatment takes place on both levels. Ethical adoptions won’t be possible until BOTH issues are addressed. And informed consent laws only address one of those issues.

]]> By: Yesterday | this woman's work http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2007/12/07/needing-to-focus/#comment-6686 Yesterday | this woman's work Sun, 09 Dec 2007 16:11:20 +0000 http://www.thiswomanswork.com/?p=1784#comment-6686 [...] were far more children here than I remember seeing) and Jessica came, too, so we talked some about these posts and about the brochures I’m supposed to write (and she told me about this [...] [...] were far more children here than I remember seeing) and Jessica came, too, so we talked some about these posts and about the brochures I’m supposed to write (and she told me about this [...]

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