For New Year
Sep 13, 2007 Book work, Writing
I’m running around like a headless chicken. I’ve got a networking meeting and then a fun networking meeting. (One for work, one for creative work.) I hope I’ll have something to write about the second. Then tomorrow we leave for our press trip, which looks like it’ll be non-stop fun fun fun (read: hectic). I’ll be skipping most of the amusement park rides ‘cuz of my still screwed up neck. (Damn.)
I talked to this fellow Rosh Hashanah celebrator (only she does it right and I just make honey cake) about where I am with this whole book dealie I’m working on and she gave me two thumbs up to head in the direction I’m heading in. It’s the obvious direction but I’m terrified and don’t really want to go there. One anonymous comment doesn’t even ruffle my feathers but add ‘em up and it’s scary. Even the comments I got on my Salon piece — mostly good (some of them even great!) but it was still horrifying. I think it must be like walking around in your swimsuit for a beauty competition. I mean, all those people just sitting there looking for flaws because it’s their job and all those other people doing it because it’s entertainment. And then when you’re up there you’re thinking, “Shoot, is the double-sided tape on my butt coming undone???” It’s just horrifying. I kept trying to push the personal away away away and it keeps coming back.
I guess I can only write the way I write and it’d be stupid to try to force a style on myself that I don’t really love or understand or have much practice in. (I mean, I love to read it but I’ve never gotten the hang of writing it.) I guess what I do write is usually personal, right? I mean the stuff that gets the most play clips-wise. It must be what I’m good at so that should be what I do. Plus I love to write it — I love it even when I hate it and right now I’m kinda hating it. Personal narrative (sounds so much better than the self-centered “memoir”) is such a joy for a mindf*cking writer like me. But sometimes I wish I could do dispassionate but thoughtful journalism. Damn.
Me and Leslie are fond of saying, “Writing is for suckers.”
Plus I’m just stuck on this naming chapter (I still think it’s the right chapter to start with). I can’t find the main thread to hold it all together.
So that makes me want to write a little bit about writing the Textured piece. For that essay I knew I was going to use doing Madison’s hair as the thread because it would give me the chance to do a few things:
- Personalize it (this isn’t a lecture about hair, it’s an illustration of my learning process);
- Organize it (the whole thing would be contained within our daily session so I wouldn’t be tempted to sprawl);
- Introduce some concepts gently (like some of the terms);
- Make for easy segues (for example, our babysitter’s comments).
And I think it worked pretty well. I could see the whole essay before I wrote it although I made big changes as I went (particularly after the editor got back to me).
I’m not seeing the same lay-out for the naming piece yet. I think I haven’t really nailed all I want this chapter to say so I can’t find a progression. I guess I have to keep brainstorming it until I can see how to turn it into a narrative. I’m also kinda getting hung up on word count, which is a mistake because word counts make me nutty.
Yeah, writing is for suckers.
September 13th, 2007 at 10:54 am
Hi, Dawn. I mostly lurk here, but after reading the anomymous comment on your Textured essay, I just had to leave you a note. For every snarky anomymous commenter who carelessly lobs unfounded criticism at you, I know that there are scores of people like me who read and appreciate your blog and other writings but rarely take the time to comment and thank you. I am a transracial adoptive parent. Your posts and essays about adoption move me, educate me, spur me to thought, sensitize me, and generally make me a better parent. In other words, because of you and your willingness and ability to write about your personal experiences in a thoughtful and insightful way, there is a three-year-old girl in Texas whose mom is less clueless and better equipped to parent than she otherwise would be. So, thank you.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:03 pm
Also, you got a positive comment from Marion Winik. That’s got to be affirming!
I thought it was a great piece.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:18 pm
That Textured essay was beautiful. Thanks for sharing it.
September 13th, 2007 at 2:05 pm
Dawn, the piece was terrific. I would love to include it in my bag of tricks when I speak with waiting a-parents. It gets right to the heart of adoptive parent responsibility in transracial and transnational adoption.
September 13th, 2007 at 2:51 pm
I thought it was a fantastic article, Dawn! I’ve sent B over to read it too