A tale of tushie wipes
Apr 28, 2007 Parenting
Madison likes new things and new experiences. She would never take the same path if another one appeared. So it’s no surprise that upon needing a tushie wipe, she implored Brett not to use the old package and instead get out the new ones that are exactly the same but are way more exciting because they are newer. Brett said, quite sensibly, “We can’t open these new ones ’til we use up the old ones.” But then he made a fatal error.
He left the old ones within her reach and left the bathroom.
You know what happened, of course. Madison promptly used up all the old ones by dumping them into the sink, running the water and squeezing all of the soap out of them. Then she skipped into the kitchen and said, “Now we can use the new ones!”
Sensing his displeasure, she scampered after him when he stomped into the bathroom. He, upon seeing the tushie wipe carnage, said, “Oh no! Madison! Why did you do such a thing?!” (Wasn’t it obvious? But one can’t blame him for his outraged shock.)
Madison, being quicker on her feet than her father said, “The crocodile did it, Daddy! Stop talking about it!”
It’s always that damn crocodile doing this stuff. Or her sister. Madison is often found in the middle of a disaster orchestrated by her mysterious, disappearing sister.
“She is gonna be in trouble about this,” she’ll say, ruefully surveying the damage with me. “Let’s not tell Daddy.”
April 28th, 2007 at 3:11 pm
Linley used to say “the robbers” did it. If you ever needed her to fess up to something and she wouldn’t, you just had to inquire about the robbers and voila, you knew exactly who did it.
My mom says I used to blame things on her poodle. Once that little dog even managed to spill nail polish all over her bed spread and get some of it on my hands in the process.
April 28th, 2007 at 3:48 pm
*laughs*
“Let’s not tell Daddy”. How very sensible she sounds, don’t you think? Don’t want to get her “sister” in trouble, after all!
I love how you’re a fantastic writer when it comes to the heavy stuff, but also a fantastic writer when it comes to conveying these little slices-of-life stuff, too!
April 28th, 2007 at 7:11 pm
haha! Glad to hear that someone else has an invisible sister too.
April 29th, 2007 at 8:21 am
she’s a riot! so amusing.
April 30th, 2007 at 8:07 pm
giggle giggle
It’s my son’s “brain” that does things he shouldn’t do, not him.
He then suggests giving his brain a time-out as a negative reinforcement. On further questioning (”how do you give a brain a time-out?”), he told us that when you’re sleeping, your brain is on a time-out. Sometimes it’s just downright eerie to hear him talk.
I am fascinated, purely fascinated by 3yo logic, because, it is, truly and absolutely logical, just unaltered by adult expectations. When older folks do this stuff, we think they’re doing it on purpose (i.e. parsing the rules and laws in their advantage, like certain politicians). But, I think 3yo’s just take everything literally.
If you’re told you can’t use the new wipes, ’cause you still have old wipes, obviously, the logical thing to do is to get rid of the old wipes!
bj
May 1st, 2007 at 5:58 pm
HA! “Let’s not tell Daddy.” Insurance, just in case you didn’t buy that ’sister’ bit.
May 9th, 2007 at 2:34 pm
Love that “lets not tell Daddy” line. Very cute.