catherine

My comments: A mother can never know until after her baby is already gone how it will really feel to be separated from him - and (because people keep telling her adoption is good for babies) she has no idea how her baby will be affected by separation from his mother during infancy, either. Hospital today try to keep moms and babies together to prevent the harm that comes from separating them. Even puppies get to stay with mom for 8 weeks. But human babies are ripped from their mothers arms as soon as possible, with no regard to how the baby will be affected.

The adoption businesses use slick advertising and “recruiters” to lure pregnant women into “counseling” in advance of birth. Then these professional con artists tell the mom she should not listen to her frends or her parents or the baby’s father, but should “be empowered” and make this decision herself. Of course all the while, they are directing “her” decision. They encourage her to “make a plan” - and later tell her she cannot deviate from “her” plan because she will hurt the feelings of the prospective adoptive people. If they really cared about the prospective adoptive people’s feelings, why would the agency get them selected in advance, before there is even an orphan? The answer is - MORE SALES.

The agency makes promises to the mom - including a promise of “just feeling good about doing the right thing”. They do this even though they know most moms (and many dads, too) have serious regrets afterwards, and a great many adoptees feel “unwanted” and abandoned by the person who was most supposed to be there for them - their true mother. These tragic consequences occur even with so-called “open” adoption. (See “Love Isn’t all You Need” by http://sonofasurrogate.tripod.com/blog/index.blog?entry_id=1536490”

That the naive mother-to-be is subjected to hearing the infertile people being called “parents” - while she is referred to as a “birthmother” (as if it were a forgone conclusion) it is very coercive.

The adoption industry conducts “brainwashing” sessions - the modern ones called “Infant Adoption Awareness Training” - that predisposition everyone to “think adoption first”. It’s sick.

What you and so many others don’t seem to understand is, there comes a time in the life of every woman who has surrendered her baby to adoption, when she discovers she’s made a big mistake. Mark my words; she doesn’t understand at the time of relinquishment, her head is too mixed up with worry, fear, wanting to do ‘the best thing for the baby’ but one day she will understand what she’s done and when it becomes clear to her it will haunt her for the rest of her life. Think about it…a mother giving her baby away?? Come on…it’s not natural!

The physiological and biological process of bonding between a mother and child begins in the womb; this is natures way of insuring the proliferation of the human race. This bond cannot be broken by distance or time. A mother loves her child from a place deep within her body, on both a physical and emotional level. It’s in her cells, in her DNA, it’s primal, it’s guttural, it comes from a place that only a woman who has had a child growing inside her can truly understand. The bond between her and her baby is so deep it will never leave her and one day her baby will also understand.

So, when she least expects it, a trigger will go off, all the logic and reasoning she had will shatter like shards of broken glass around her feet and she will awaken from her dream only to find herself in a nightmare. And to make matters worse…her child will one day realize that it grew up without his or her mother; a fate that, at one time in our society, wouldn’t have been forced upon or accepted from the poorest among us. Yes, there was a time when the relationship between mother and child was considered sacred and the duty of a woman who brought a child into the world was to be upheld for she was the baby’s mother and she was responsible for raising her baby.

Just like a mother who has lost a child to death could no easier substitute one child for the next nor can a mother who has lost a child to adoption do the same. In reality it’s almost worse to lose a child to adoption then to lose one to death because with adoption you live each day knowing your child is out there somewhere. Again…I know from first hand experience for I lost my one and only child to adoption, searched and found him dead.

This is the voice of experience…why can’t you hear me?

Remember…those who don’t learn from history (others’ mistakes) are condemned to repeat it.

A word to the wise SHOULD be sufficient….