Comments on: I am liking this photo blog software

By: KrisAnne

KrisAnne — Tue, 31 Jan 2006 22:22:56 +0000

Hi Dawn, I just recently started reading; we have adopted 2 children. I could relate to much of your insecurity with our first child. By the time, we adopted our second, I felt much more secure in my role. For example, our first child cried A LOT! I worried that it was because he missed his birthmother. Enter the second child who acted as if she’d been here since the first minute of her life…always cheerful and happy. I realized then that it was so much more personality than any other factor. Adoption is a journey. My feelings about adoption when our oldest was a baby/toddler are so different than where we are now after 9 years. It becomes a journey of a different kind once your child has more input into how s/he feels about adoption.

By: Poor_Statue

Poor_Statue — Sat, 21 Jan 2006 23:55:31 +0000

A lesbian friend of mine was the first to suggest adoption to me. As time went on and we talked more about it, she was quite adamant about the fact that she could never have an open adoption. Her feeling was that two mothers was odd enough, she couldn’t imagine sharing motherhood among three women. It never mattered what I shared with her.

Anyway, it is so nice to have your voice out here. You say it all so well.

By: Jess

Jess — Sat, 21 Jan 2006 20:07:34 +0000

As an a-parent in an entirely closed (international) adoption, I wish I could have it another way. While I wouldn’t ever wish that I’d not adopted the way that I did–because then I wouldn’t have my daughter–I do wish that, somehow, we could have contact with her birthfamily, in particular her birthmother. It would be better for Hannah; it would be better for me. I hope it would be better for L.

By: magicpointeshoe

magicpointeshoe — Sat, 21 Jan 2006 19:13:26 +0000

Awww, I’m glad that I could nudge you. Let’s make this a total love fest! You have given me a real voice to the things I always suspected about my birthson’s parents. That they were more than a stereotype and just as plagued by the plurality of emotions that I had. And that makes me treasure them and you so much more.

By: Karen M

Karen M — Sat, 21 Jan 2006 18:15:16 +0000

Absolutely right. I came to adoption through infertility too, although mine was primary infertility. I think that an open adoption has been both harder and easier than I expected. I don’t write about this on my own blog a lot, as I’ve gotten a whale of a hard time from our families about my views on the subject.

Would I go for a closed adoption the next time? No. It’s not been easy, but I wouldn’t change a thing.