What a way to start the new year
Oct 4, 2005 Writing
I woke up with a sore throat and slight fever and thus no desire to go hear the shofar. Jewish guilt, indeed. And Noah doesn’t want to go because it means he’ll miss self-defense. More Jewish guilt. I can get his grandparents to take him to self-defense and then Madison and I can stay home and sleep (services start during Madison’s usual nap).
Guilt guilt guilt.
Does it count that I made a round challah yesterday? And carrots shaped like coins glazed in maple syrup? And honey cake? And that we had a nice family celebration?
Probably not. I’ll have to call Brett and make him listen to me work it out.
I talked to J this weekend about coming over to take Madison trick-or-treating. Noah is going with his cousin (Brett, too) and I’ll stay here to pass out candy. Madison is too young to eat any candy, mind you, but I figured if J wanted to, she could hit a few houses. So that looks like what we’re going to do.
I still need to write the article due yesterday (if I can catch a nap I should be up to writing tonight) and I have to make a decision about whether or not I want to have folks at the writers’ retreat this weekend crit any in-progress essays. I worked on two of them last week and got a tiny bit further. Fresh eyes might help but I don’t know if I’m up for it.
So if a writer writes something no one will ever read, is it worth writing? Answer: Probably, maybe, I guess. In other words, do I want to work on something even if it may not find an audience? If so, how hard do I want to work on it? Theoretically I know writing is all about process but I get so little time to work that I feel guilty if I’m not spending time on something more practical.
October 4th, 2005 at 10:58 am
I believe guilt comes with the territory, though - it’s kind of part of the package. And we didn’t make it to shul either, for the same reason - sore throat, feeling yucky and very stressed with work. I think we’ll go down to the stream after work and throw in some breadcrumbs instead, think about our hopes for the new year, and come home and eat apples and honey. Don’t feel bad - you’re not alone!
October 4th, 2005 at 2:18 pm
I’m having similar writing struggles now– do I go back and still work on essays that have been rejected over and over, or should I move forward? I think I’ve been spending too much energy worrying about “placing” essays these days, and should be spending a greater proportion of my writing time on actually making them as good as I can possibly make them, whether or not I think they’ll get published– I think that’s more likely to make the kind of writer I want to be.
October 5th, 2005 at 9:51 am
I’ve been thinking about the guilt thing and I think there are dispensations available - I think you should get one.
October 5th, 2005 at 11:21 am
I think it counts (but what do I know, I’m a shiksa.) I think those intimate family celebrations and rituals will leave deep imprints on your kids, probably deeper than a service. And isn’t that what its really about- loving G-d with all our hearts and souls and teaching that to our children? Hey, I pay attention during the prayers.
October 5th, 2005 at 8:02 pm
Challah and honey cake ddefinitely counts in my book.
But what do I know?
October 6th, 2005 at 5:27 am
Did you just channel me with that last paragraph? Because you could have! I think the answer is yes, and what jackie said, but I’m with you on the guilt over not being practical. Sigh.