Fathers and child support
LauraBZ asks: “a question about birthfathers - say the b-mom had decided to parent; is there a law that then makes b-fathers financially responsible? or are they allowed to relinquish their parental rights?”
I’m not positive about this but I believe it varies by state. If a woman is parenting then the father of her child has to pay child support. I believe that the mother can allow him to relinquish his parental rights but that he can’t make this choice himself. I may be wrong about this but when I’m thinking of women I know who have absentee fathers not in the lives of their kids, those fathers are still expected to pay child support. And if the mother allows her child to be adopted, say, in a stepdad situation (where she will still parent), he will relinquish all parental rights. If he hasn’t been stepping up with visits and/or financial support, I believe she won’t have to get his permission although I’m positive this depends on the state.
Anyone else have more insight about this?
In many states–Michigan is one–it is extremely difficult to get parental rights relinquished, even if the mother agrees to allow it. The state simply is not willing to let a bio father walk away from his (financial) responsibilities unless there is somebody else willing to take them up (aka an adoptive stepparent, etc).
Oops, I forgot to add that at least in Michigan it’s fairly easy for the courts to terminate a father’s rights without his permission if he has not been financially responsible OR had contact with the child. I think it has to be both, not one or the other.
It works both ways though, doesn’t it? I can’t base this on anything in particular, but it’s always been my understanding that unless there are special circumstances, when the father is named both parents must agree to the adoption. If either parent doesn’t consent, then both parents are responsible for supporting the child.
It’s usually men paying child support we hear about because the mother more frequently wants and gets custody, but there are men out there with custody, and I have heard of women who must pay child support to them.
And I’m sure it’s not what Laura was getting at, but the first thing that popped to my mind was talk I’ve heard in the past about how unfair it is that women get all the choices and can stick a man with child support payments if she wants. Which is why I wanted to point out that as far as I know, it goes both ways.
It’s always been my understanding that in the US, regardless of state law, mothers cannot relinquish paternal rights. The support of the father for his child is considered a protected right of the CHILD, and the mother cannot cede that right away on the child’s behalf. The only exception would be relinquishment of custody in the case of an adoption. I can’t get into details, but there have been two legal cases in my extended family around these issues, in separate states. Mothers cannot forego child support on behalf of their children. (The enforcement of child support arrangements is an entirely different story. And when the mother doesn’t name a father, then it gets more complicated. That’s probably the easiest way for a mother to “relinquish” child support: by not naming a father in the first place.)
One of the issues you’ll see come up from time to time in abortion debates is the issue of fathers, and their lack of choice: if a woman proceeds with her pregnancy, the father will be required by law to support that child. And many states are now requiring that women name a father on birth certificates, arguing that children without two named parents are more likely by far to end up on state welfare roles (i.e., there’s a compelling state interest, as well as a child’s right, at stake). In light of that, some father’s rights groups argue that men should have the right to “abort” their _responsibility_ for a child (i.e., relinquish parental rights before the child is born) in the same way that a woman can abort the child without his consent.