Today is Noah’s birthday
Jan 28, 2005 Parenting
As of 5:15am PST (since he was born in Portland), Noah left 7-year oldness behind and launched himself into 8-year oldness.
This birthday is especially significant because when he was four, he announced that he wanted a lizard.
“You can get one when you’re eight,” I foolishly promised, not realizing that one day he would actually be eight and I’d have to make good.
This morning, after a celebratory breakfast, the four of us went to Captive Born Reptiles to fulfill the lizard promise. Alas, we have come home empty-handed.
This fellow (or one awfully like him) looked to be a good bet. The owner guided us through beginner lizard prep helping us understand both the commitment and the fun of each junior-friendly lizard. We settled on the Albino Leopard Gecko because the set-up looked easy, the maintenance looked easy, and he was extremely calm and cute. We each held him — Noah all nervous giggles — but it was clear that the boy was feeling overwhelmed and worried.
When the gecko (Noah says he would name him Petri) casually climbed up Noah’s arm and licked his neck, I knew all was lost.
Poor Noah is feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility of such a pet, which is a good thing. As we told him, it’s important to be thoughtful about pet acquisition since they don’t deserve to die just because we learned too late that it was all a bit much for us. Noah is mostly worried about the regular handling required to tame a lizard, although this one was already extraordinarily calm and tame. He says he would dump in the crickets and help me wash the cage (or rather that I would help him) but it’s the handling that scares him.
We left with a very sad little boy in the backseat.
It could be that we will still end up getting Petri or a Petri relative but Noah has to think on it. As parents, we’re left to the difficult task of not saying a word — no more encouragement, no more warnings, no more sympathetic commentary. When Noah says, “No! Absolutely not!” it often means, “Please leave me alone to think about it all by myself.”
He’s really torn. Four years he’s been wanting this and now he’s thinking maybe he should wait ’til he’s nine but he’s awfully sad. Even the Gram and Gramps festivities tonight, the Grandma celebration tomorrow, the Grandpa visit tomorrow night and the raucous swim party on Sunday will do little to soothe his wearied soul. This child is harder on himself than we could ever be.
I hope he decides to get Petri or makes peace with his decision to walk away. I hope that the Robosapien robot Grandma will be giving him tomorrow makes up for it. I’ll let you all know what he decides.
January 28th, 2005 at 11:59 am
Double post hiccup again.
January 28th, 2005 at 1:00 pm
I’m dying to hear what Noah actually decides, and I think that it is amazingly mature of him to realize that there’s a possibility that he might not be ready.
I’ve always known that any pet was too much responsiility for me. I’m the only one I know who neve asked for a pet when I was a kid. I also believe that there are far too many kids who are given kids that they’re not prepared for (which is OK, if it’s really the mom’s pet, but not if it’s the kids).
My four year old has been asking for a pet (I think more for acquisition than for real), and we’re figuring out how to negotiate this. I hope that 8 she’ll be mature enough to know what responsibility she can handle.
January 28th, 2005 at 1:01 pm
oops, I mean kids who are given pets, although the phrase “kids who are given kids” probably was a bit freudian.
bj
January 28th, 2005 at 1:24 pm
to Noah,
My son, Eric had two leopard geckos and 2 bearded dragons. The beardies from babies. He did a science fair project on which was the easiest/funest to take care of for a kid. The beardies won. They loved being held and were up during the day. He feed them daily. He had them all for 2 years. One did die. We don’t know why. He was 6 when he had these. The reason he sold them, was his life became too full for him to take care of them. He did use the money from them to purchase a red haired tarantula, that is happy in his cage, but happier when Eric comes home. But for those fewyears, the fun and companionship of those beardies/gecko’s is unreplaceable. He also won $25 (second place) for the local science fair at age 6!!
I look forward to hearing your decision.
January 28th, 2005 at 3:13 pm
Happy Birthday Noah!!!!
If he does get the lizard, I’d love to bend your ear about the common mistakes lizard owners make regarding nutrition. I worked for a vet treated exotics (like lizards) and the number of them I saw sick and dying from eating store-bought crickets is astounding. The problem is that the crickets are raised on NEWSPAPER and therefore have no nutrional value. Lizards are better off eating cat food. Seriously.
I’m full of assvice if you want it!
January 28th, 2005 at 6:35 pm
Wow. Is he your kid, or what?
Happy birthday, Noah. You are definitely one of our all-time favorite kids and one of these days, you’ll make a great pet-dad, of whatever type you settle on!
January 28th, 2005 at 8:06 pm
Noah is the sweetest little boy. I wish him a very happy birthday and luck in his decision making. And, as the wife of a man who was very much like Noah when he was a boy, I feel confident that this deep sensitivity to the world will serve him well.
Best!
Margaret