Comments on: More on surrender & adoption http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/ writing, mothering, writing about mothering Sun, 07 Sep 2008 08:19:48 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc By: Ally http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/#comment-11439 Ally Tue, 15 Jun 2004 23:59:35 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1201#comment-11439 Hi Dawn, last June when I had Jordan I signed my parental rights 48 hours after he was born and the day i was released. his father signed them the day he was released. I could have waited until than as well since he spent a couple of extra days in the hospital in the NICU. His adoptive parents took him home from the hospital and my counslor from the agency was there since they became his gaurdian. They had to wait five days before they could take him back to Atlanta. His adoption was final on November 17. I believe we have the normal six months to change our mnd period as well. Neither of us had to be in court at all. I'll have to ask my counslor about being involved with the next placement if that had every happened. I did the semi open adoption, so I meet his parents and everything before he was born. Ally Hi Dawn,

last June when I had Jordan I signed my parental rights 48 hours after he was born and the day i was released. his father signed them the day he was released. I could have waited until than as well since he spent a couple of extra days in the hospital in the NICU.

His adoptive parents took him home from the hospital and my counslor from the agency was there since they became his gaurdian. They had to wait five days before they could take him back to Atlanta. His adoption was final on November 17. I believe we have the normal six months to change our mnd period as well. Neither of us had to be in court at all.

I’ll have to ask my counslor about being involved with the next placement if that had every happened. I did the semi open adoption, so I meet his parents and everything before he was born.

Ally

]]> By: maria http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/#comment-11438 maria Tue, 15 Jun 2004 04:22:06 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1201#comment-11438 In Virginia the laws are different for private vs agency adoption. If it's private the birth mother has to appear in court when the baby at least 10 days old. If it's an agency adoption she can sign her parental rights over to the agency who will then appear in court. The birth father can sign at any time after the baby's birth in front of a notary public. With our adoptions we gave the birthmoms the option of going with an agency to avoid the court hearing, but both of them declined. In fact, I think for Jane's adoption having the formality of a consent hearing was very important. Once the consent is signed, the birth mother (or father) has 15 days to revolk consent. No matter what kind of adoption it is, once that revocation period is over, a 6-month probationary period begins. During that time a social worker visits the family 3 times and writes a report for the court. Only after the end of those 6 months can the adoption be finalized. In Virginia the laws are different for private vs agency adoption. If it’s private the birth mother has to appear in court when the baby at least 10 days old. If it’s an agency adoption she can sign her parental rights over to the agency who will then appear in court. The birth father can sign at any time after the baby’s birth in front of a notary public. With our adoptions we gave the birthmoms the option of going with an agency to avoid the court hearing, but both of them declined. In fact, I think for Jane’s adoption having the formality of a consent hearing was very important.

Once the consent is signed, the birth mother (or father) has 15 days to revolk consent. No matter what kind of adoption it is, once that revocation period is over, a 6-month probationary period begins. During that time a social worker visits the family 3 times and writes a report for the court. Only after the end of those 6 months can the adoption be finalized.

]]> By: katie http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/#comment-11437 katie Tue, 15 Jun 2004 00:57:26 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1201#comment-11437 in missouri, the birthfather does not have to appear in court - just the birthmother. in my case, the birthfather was able to sign the paperwork in his own home, two hours away. i had to make a bumpy, miserable, 45 minute ride to the county courthouse on a fresh episiotomy to surrender my rights in public. gotta say i think that was pretty unfair. in missouri, the birthfather does not have to appear in court - just the birthmother. in my case, the birthfather was able to sign the paperwork in his own home, two hours away. i had to make a bumpy, miserable, 45 minute ride to the county courthouse on a fresh episiotomy to surrender my rights in public. gotta say i think that was pretty unfair.

]]> By: Karen http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/#comment-11436 Karen Mon, 14 Jun 2004 19:48:43 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1201#comment-11436 Not having to go before a judge would be a nice option for birthparents to have, I think. Alena's birthfather in particular was having a hard time appearing in court. It would have been easier and allowed him to have a little more of his dignity - if that makes sense - for him to terminate his rights in private and not in front of the judge. The laws have changed in CO. Now the birthparents can terminate their parental rights at any time after the baby's birth. In practice, it's whenever the court has room on the calendar. In our case, it was 6 weeks. Once the court date happens, it's final and irrevocable. If we had been found unfit to parent, the agency would have had custody of Alena and she would go back to foster care until they could find new adoptive parents. I don't think that the birthparents would have any say in selecting the new family. Not having to go before a judge would be a nice option for birthparents to have, I think. Alena’s birthfather in particular was having a hard time appearing in court. It would have been easier and allowed him to have a little more of his dignity - if that makes sense - for him to terminate his rights in private and not in front of the judge.

The laws have changed in CO. Now the birthparents can terminate their parental rights at any time after the baby’s birth. In practice, it’s whenever the court has room on the calendar. In our case, it was 6 weeks. Once the court date happens, it’s final and irrevocable. If we had been found unfit to parent, the agency would have had custody of Alena and she would go back to foster care until they could find new adoptive parents. I don’t think that the birthparents would have any say in selecting the new family.

]]> By: Lisa http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/06/12/more-on-surrender-adoption/#comment-11435 Lisa Mon, 14 Jun 2004 05:00:04 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1201#comment-11435 We were able to take Mallory home before her birthparents terminated their rights. She was just over 12 hours old. This was on Thursday, her birthparents went to court and TPR'ed on Tuesday. Our agency said we could choose to have Mallory go to fostercare, but many birthparents were offended by this. They also said that both the potential adoptive parents and birthparents worried about the baby so much that unless someone requested it , the baby goes home with the adoptive family. I wasn't concerned they would change their mind, her birthmom promised me that she wouldn't let me take the baby home if she had any doubts. In retrospect I wish they had taken more time with Mallory in the hospital, they stayed awake all night and roomed with her. They really insisted this was the way they wanted it. During the 6 months before the adoption was finalized, if we were unfit Mallory would have been in the custody of the agency, her birthparents would have had no rights to her. We were able to take Mallory home before her birthparents terminated their rights. She was just over 12 hours old. This was on Thursday, her birthparents went to court and TPR’ed on Tuesday. Our agency said we could choose to have Mallory go to fostercare, but many birthparents were offended by this. They also said that both the potential adoptive parents and birthparents worried about the baby so much that unless someone requested it , the baby goes home with the adoptive family. I wasn’t concerned they would change their mind, her birthmom promised me that she wouldn’t let me take the baby home if she had any doubts. In retrospect I wish they had taken more time with Mallory in the hospital, they stayed awake all night and roomed with her. They really insisted this was the way they wanted it. During the 6 months before the adoption was finalized, if we were unfit Mallory would have been in the custody of the agency, her birthparents would have had no rights to her.

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