Comments on: Will she let me? http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/ writing, mothering, writing about mothering Sun, 07 Sep 2008 14:11:42 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc By: kim.kim http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/#comment-11074 kim.kim Thu, 31 Aug 2006 14:15:55 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1142#comment-11074 It's not only about the child and the adoptive parents, open adoption, it's that we love our children so very very much, may we PLEASE have just a little bit of time with them too? Not seeing L. grow up and not knowing where she was and how she was absolutely broke my heart and made my life very painful. I know she asked about me too, wanted to know what I looked like and who I was and where I was. And I missed her so horribly, it was awful. Birthdays were just unbearable, I cried until my eyes were all puffy and hid in the house and wondered how I would get through the day alive. So I think open adoption is a good thing for mothers like me who adore our children and who would suffer terrible were we not allowed to have just a teensy bit of what you as the full time parents have. One more thing, if we mums are allowed in to our children's lives they don't have to go through the weirdness of reunion and all the baggage that comes with getting to know your mother after years of silence. It’s not only about the child and the adoptive parents, open adoption, it’s that we love our children so very very much, may we PLEASE have just a little bit of time with them too?

Not seeing L. grow up and not knowing where she was and how she was absolutely broke my heart and made my life very painful. I know she asked about me too, wanted to know what I looked like and who I was and where I was.
And I missed her so horribly, it was awful. Birthdays were just unbearable, I cried until my eyes were all puffy and hid in the house and wondered how I would get through the day alive.
So I think open adoption is a good thing for mothers like me who adore our children and who would suffer terrible were we not allowed to have just a teensy bit of what you as the full time parents have.
One more thing, if we mums are allowed in to our children’s lives they don’t have to go through the weirdness of reunion and all the baggage that comes with getting to know your mother after years of silence.

]]> By: Jill http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/#comment-11073 Jill Thu, 31 Aug 2006 14:09:07 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1142#comment-11073 Thanks for sharing this, Dawn. I am working through some of the issues that you worked through concerning infertility and adoption, and I found this post to be helpful. Thanks for sharing this, Dawn. I am working through some of the issues that you worked through concerning infertility and adoption, and I found this post to be helpful.

]]> By: Sara http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/#comment-11072 Sara Thu, 13 May 2004 18:21:31 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1142#comment-11072 This was absolutly brilliant. Thank you for sharing such an amazing journey. This was absolutly brilliant. Thank you for sharing such an amazing journey.

]]> By: Sarah http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/#comment-11071 Sarah Mon, 10 May 2004 16:38:44 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1142#comment-11071 Dawn, Lovely lovely entry. I worked with an adopted girl (16) last year who was adopted at birth and had an open adoption. I found this book really helpful in working with her feelings and especially her mother (adoptive). I'm sure you don't have much time to read, but it might be a good source for when you write your book. Sarah The Birth of an Adoptive, Foster or Stepmother: Beyond Biological Mothering Attachments By Barbara Waterman PhD Dawn,
Lovely lovely entry. I worked with an adopted girl (16) last year who was adopted at birth and had an open adoption. I found this book really helpful in working with her feelings and especially her mother (adoptive). I’m sure you don’t have much time to read, but it might be a good source for when you write your book.
Sarah

The Birth of an Adoptive, Foster or Stepmother: Beyond Biological Mothering Attachments By Barbara Waterman PhD

]]> By: Rachel http://www.thiswomanswork.com/2004/05/05/will-she-let-me/#comment-11070 Rachel Thu, 06 May 2004 19:40:13 +0000 http://thiswomanswork.com/?p=1142#comment-11070 This is dazzling in its honesty and forthrightness. Thank you for posting it. This is dazzling in its honesty and forthrightness. Thank you for posting it.

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