I’m just not sure
I’m not sure what to do about my blog. I get like this every few months, where I think it’s become too much of a Linus security blanket. Usually what this means is that my blog — my life — is in transition.
I’m feeling a bit disgruntled about all of this writing stuff. Yesterday I got out my laptop and I looked at it and I looked at Madison about to snuffle awake in the swing and realized that I needed to use this time to hang out the diapers so I put the laptop away.
I feel a little bit like a kid pressing my nose up against the window of a candy store watching all the other kids sucking on lollipops and chewing salt water taffy. I’m stuck here in postpartum land.
What helps is remembering that my writing life is waiting patiently for me. With Noah it was much harder because I didn’t think I would ever get myself back. Now I know that it just takes time and that this investment here at the beginning is worth it.
Meanwhile, I keep wondering what will happen to this blog. I don’t want to just post pictures forever. What will I write about next? I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.
When the sun doesn’t rise, when hell freezes over, and when Bush follows the All Faith Help Creed, then maybe (and this is just a possibility) you will stop writing. Until then, I don’t think we’ll all suffer too much if you don’t post an entry everyday.
All my love to you and yours, Dawn.
After the arrival of my second, I felt these same emotions. Heck, I still do, since my two are so young. That candy store analogy hit home so much, because I often find myself there, and will be again soon when #3 shows up. This time, though, I’m not even trying to write or worrying about writing until my mind starts craving it. It took about 3 months after my 2nd for that to happen.
We’ll be here regardless
Hugs, Mama