Schedules
I have got to get it together.
I had a nervous breakdown yesterday. An interview got screwed up on a last minute assignment I was given and I cried for over an hour. It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t the interviewees fault. It was, as Cole Porter famously said, just one of those things but it brought me to wracking, snotty sobs. Clearly, I’m way too stressed out.
I’ve been worried anyway because contract jobs are by definition (contract) scary. Mine will be up in October and whether or not they’ll hire me is anybody’s guess. I don’t deal much with the powers that be at the home office; I talk to fellow underlings and go through my boss, herself a contract worker. She tries to give me a heads up on how things are going but really — since she telecommutes, too — it’s hard to say.
Part of me wanted the job to go away in the fall. I like the work an awful lot but there’s a lot of it and I haven’t been good at organizing things. So now I’m going to try organizing things and see if it’s possible to stay on even if I take some time off when the baby arrives.
Here are my plans:
1) Work out three times a week so I don’t go insane. I’m going to do this in the mornings before Noah wakes up. I joined a gym again because I think having a routine outside of the house will make that easier.
2) Create office hours and stick to them. No work-related phone calls (I’m getting caller ID to facilitate this); no email, no nothing. It’s too easy to wander in here to see if I’ve heard back from someone and stay an hour. If I do a better job of segregating work and home, I think I won’t feel as scattered.
3) Get back to “lesson” planning my activities with Noah on Sunday mornings. I’ve let things slide and we’ve been missing out on some cool stuff this summer.
4) Start saying no to people. Because I work at home, people don’t realize that I am, in fact, working. Working really hard. I need to explain to them that I am.
4) Continue to get things really full up in my editorial calendar. If they don’t re-hire me, the writers will weather the transition well because it’ll give the next person time to learn the ropes before they have to start pulling stuff in again. If they do re-hire me, I won’t be in hell when the baby comes and I need to pull back for awhile.
I know this will be hard with a baby but frankly, freelancing would be worse and we need the money. We’re putting my salary away right now instead of working on our “debt pay down” program so that if my contract isn’t renewed, I’ll still be able to take some time off.
We’ll see.
But for those of you who write for me, know that I’ll be answering emails in a less timely manner for my sanity’s sake. You will hear from me eventually, I promise.
(((((((((((Dawn)))))))))))))
Damn girl, for someone who thinks they may have had a breakdown yesterday, you sure as h*ll look like you have your act together and know what needs to be done. Great plan by the looks of it. Stick to it and I promise, it will get better
best of luck, dear Dawn. do what you need to do to keep yourself sane, okay? your plate is full, and there’s no harm in letting us all know that right now, you’re trying to savor some of the other courses.
It’s amazing how synchronous people’s lives are. At least when it comes to the blogs I read. I, too, need to get my shit together. Part of that is paying attention to how I use my time. Today I wrote myself a note that says “30 minutes of work, 15 minutes of play.” What happened when I stuck to it was that I ended up working for over 45 minutes.
Also–good luck and it sounds like you have a great schedule planned out.
Take it from a Mama that has had 2 break downs that required hospitalizations–energy is as precious as gold! Be very careful of where and how you spend your energy. You are doing a lot and doing it extremely well. Stay focused on avoiding energy drainers (people, places, things) you’ll pull out of the funk.
Mamamojo