And Dawn responds
Feb 21, 2003 Writing
Someone posted (anonymously) to the announcement below and I wanted to respond.
S/he wrote:
“If you decide that it is not your business when someone else suffers, don’t think that your understanding of karma will permit your act of callousness to go without its effects upon you. The suffering that you see is fair. Every experience in this Earth school is fair, but if you use your realization of this to ignore the suffering of your brothers and sisters, you create a world in which your suffering, also, is of no concern to others. That is karma.“Everything that you do is a choice, and every choice that you make creates experiences that you will encounter. That is karma.” ~Gary Zukav
Now I thought, hmmm, this person could be commenting about how all of the writers were suffering by a decision not of their choosing and are now getting lambasted for stepping up and doing what they can to salvage their livelihoods from the mess. Think about it, we were all put out of work without warning because the powers that be were having “business and creative differences.” I wasn’t having business or creative differences with anybody; I was perfectly happy writing my copy and turning it in but there I was, out of work. Sure there were promises of future endeavors but it became apparent that future endeavors might be a very long time coming. If ever.
However since the person posted anonymously, I believe they’re trying to say that because some of us decided to stay on and even move up (despite admonitions to follow our leaders away from a regular paycheck), that we are participating in the suffering of said leaders.
I personally don’t think that staying at a job is an “act of callousness.” My staying out of work is going to benefit anyone. It won’t stop the lawsuits and it won’t undo the damage already done. However, if I do remain out of work, my family suffers.
Like I said, I’ll never know exactly what happened. I don’t question that Betsy and Nancy walked for reasons that made perfect sense to them; I’m not privvy to those reasons. I was asked to walk, too, and to trust them that it would be the right decision for me. I sat down, looked at my finances (and the adoption application on which I’d just filled out my meager salary), and then talked to Majestic Media to hear their side of it. When I heard that Sheri had the job, I felt confident that I should stay.
I don’t question anyone else’s right to make different decisions but I get a little pissed off when I’m told that unless I screw my family and follow people into a decision that I think was hasty, I’m the bad guy. Puh-leeze!
My experience with Majestic has been good. My experience with Myria has been good. I was friends with the women at Myria but I’m friends with Sheri, too. But my loyalty is to my family.
Anyway, back to that karma. I guess if anyone’s suffering in this, they ought to look back at their own karma scoreboard and think long and hard about what their responsibility is for their situation.
February 21st, 2003 at 1:05 pm
I think walking away from a paying job is naive, and taking it lightly is a sign that the individual involved has never really suffered economic hardship.
Sure, it’s good to act according to your principles, but given that it was a commercial publication that accepted advertising, it makes sense to be realistic about the commericial interests of one’s employer.
February 21st, 2003 at 2:07 pm
I would wonder about the karma of someone who leaves creepy anonymous messages on someone else’s journal.
February 21st, 2003 at 5:43 pm
Amen to what Sarah said. And to add my own two cents, Gary Zukav is an intellectual lightweight–quoting him is like quoting Mr. Rogers. Despite that, I’m sure Mr. Zukav would be dismayed to find someone using his words to try to cause someone else pain.
Careful, buddy, your karma might run over your dogma.
February 21st, 2003 at 5:59 pm
Everyone has the right to make decisions that are best for themselves and their families. I’m very happy for you that your job will continue with someone you know and respect - especially with the adoption coming up. It was a well-considered, mature and responsible decision, and anyone who judges you (anonymously, no less) for it is saying more about themselves than about you.
February 22nd, 2003 at 2:09 am
Ms. Friedman - You never were an employee, correct? So you were never GUARANTEED job security in the first place … to question the integrity of your friends - was the wrong thing to do - …you should have NEVER depended on a FREELANCE contract to determine whether or not your adoption goes through… you are a trader…and you will one day see that even though it may help you get that so longed for baby… professionally, you will probably be looking for work AGAIN in the not to distant future…
February 22nd, 2003 at 2:40 am
Dear Dawn - you know what I should have not called you a trader but a traitor - but actually I should not have called you that at all… I just think you should have believed more in your friends.. sounded like they were good friends….regardless.. I shouldn’t have said that.. that was harsh…
February 22nd, 2003 at 10:00 am
(((((Dawn))))) I know this was a hard decision for you.
February 22nd, 2003 at 11:19 am
Hey, Mary, I’m sure you’re right about Gary Zukav but don’t knock Mr. Rogers. He spoke at my brother’s college graduation two years ago and there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. I have a quotation from the speech posted above my desk:
“…deep down we know that what matters in this life is much more than winning for ourselves. What really matters is helping others win, too, even if it means slowing down and changing our course now and then.”
I read it whenever I start to forget why I spend my days among diapers and dishes.
February 22nd, 2003 at 1:30 pm
Dawn,
I’ve been reading your blog with interest and an open mind. I feel compelled to respond on two points:
1) Zelda wrote: “I think walking away from a paying job is naive, and taking it lightly is a sign that the individual involved has never really suffered economic hardship.” As “one who walked,” I can tell you that a) I did so out of a desire not to be naive; b) I have four children and an unemployed husband, so believe me — I neither “take my decision lightly” nor am I unfamiliar with economic hardship; and c) I’ve posted my spiel publicly (http://www.sandscommunications.com/epregletter.html) and I am not the anonymous poster. Though I don’t know who this poster is, I’ve been told he/she was commenting on the public airing of the issue, not on you and your decision.
Every individual must make her own choices, and it’s not for me to judge them. I am responsible — and therefore can be judgmental — only for my own. I thought this choice through thoroughly and so did you — we just came to two different conclusions.
I hope we all come through this with something good, and I wish you well with the adoption.