New babies
Apr 23, 2002 Ancient Archives, Infertility
I finally got to see my friend’s new baby on Sunday. She’s just adorable! I always forget how strange brand-new babies are with all their unearthly squeaks and groans! But beautiful, too, in a wonderful new-baby kind of way.
Another friend of mine kept offering to take the food that I made over for me. I think she was trying to protect me in case visiting the new baby would be emotionally difficult in my time of fertility challenges. Actually, I am not bothered by being around new babies in the least. And I don’t mind being around my pregnant friends. I was very excited that I got to meet Sasha and only sorry that I didn’t get to hold her (Noah was in my lap and wouldn’t get out — he has issues with babies).
OK, I’ll admit that when I first get that “I’m pregnant!” announcement, it can be hard. When I hear it, my first thought is, “And I’m not.” And then I start thinking about how I’ve been trying longer or harder or whatever and I’ll have about 24 hours of sadness. But then I’m over it. Really. Very quickly I grasp that their good news does not in any way make my own trials worse. I mean, it’s not like there’s a finite amount of pregnancy energy in the world and everyone else is hogging it and not leaving enough for me. I get that. So to those of my friends who are gestating: thanks so much for being kind enough to be concerned about telling me but know that my happiness for you all is genuine! And I’m excited to think of the new baby announcements that will be coming later this year.
As I’ve said on this blog before, I’ve quit assuming that all my friends are psychic and I’ve started telling them what I need. I had one friend who was pregnant and was so apologetic about it every time we talked that it really got on my nerves. At first, I fumed about it without saying anything which is not helpful. When I told her that it was ok that she was pregnant and I was happy for her and she didn’t need to feel bad about it, we both experienced HUGE relief. I wish I had told her sooner.
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